Was when my mum told me that she loved me!
Let me explain… (+ be 100% vulnerable).
This year I made peace… with my mother. After seven years of not talking.
Why am I sharing this message now?
In all honesty? If it helps you make peace with someone you love, despite the HUGE emotional gap you’ve created with your stories… then this is worth sharing. Because you never know how much time you still have, together.
This whole change of heart was sparked by a wonderful woman I met last year in Colorado. She told me in no uncertain terms that my mum is my mum, no matter how many emotional stories (+ hurt) exist between us.
She was right.
Before I was ready to forgive I had to put my ego out of the way.
To be brutally honest… it took me a (long) while.
My ego kept throwing thoughts at me, usually at 3am:
- I couldn’t just ignore the hurt.
- I was the younger, less experienced person in this war of egos (or was I?)?
- What if I tried reconnecting and it didn’t work out?
- Does she really want to hear from me… after all these years?
- In the end I made the first move. I reached out to my mum, because I didn’t want to regret not trying.
And guess what happened next?
Our relationship started to heal. Slowly, cautiously we got to know each other again. We reconnected, first by email, then for real while I was in Switzerland.
We had the most amazing time together! I’m soooo grateful for that. No one can take away the memories we created.
And I’m also grateful for knowing that my mum has booked her trip, to visit me in France. I feel freaking excited about that. Can you feel it?
Thanks Maureen for giving me the kick I needed to put my ego aside. You’d be happy to know that my mum and I reconnected, and that we put the past behind us to create a happier future together.
The moral of the story? Is to remember the power of love. And to put your ego aside if you want to heal a broken relationship with someone that (really) matters to you.
- Maybe you fell out with your best girlfriend?
- Maybe you got estranged from a parent or child?
- Maybe you get all sweaty and bothered thinking about that person who sent you a hate mail?
- Maybe you upset a client/boss, and he/she has done the unthinkable and sacked you.
The thing is: when we’re upset we tend to say things we regret later. That’s how rifts happen.
That’s how we create emotional CHAOS.
Sometimes, those rifts are unfixable. I totally get that.
But sometimes there’s (still) hope… to recreate the peace, love and harmony you once felt for each other.
Are you willing to TRY?
Your challenge? Is to forgive the hurt and reach out to ONE estranged person today. Pick up the phone. Send an email. Write a letter. It doesn’t matter HOW you connect. Just DO IT!
And remember: the other person probably feels just as hurt as you do. So unless one of you makes the first move, nothing changes.
Your first step? Comment below and tell me with whom you’re going to make peace. You can totally do this. The payoff is HUGE!